Photo from Flickr by mikebaird

Seniors or people beyond 50 need not be alone at all, most especially when watching movies, going to the malls, visiting interesting places, going to the doctor, or even dining out. Being mature in age does not mean being alone is okay, because it’s not. That, however, is dependent on the person’s preferences. Many seniors end up being alone only because of one thing – they do not know where to find people who can help them out and be with them.

That has changed.

Are you a senior and you want to have someone beside you, whether as a special friend, a confidante, or a lover or mate? The possibility is endless because help is on the way – find a friend via online dating sites.

What Are Online Dating Sites?

It’s practically what it says: it’s an online dating service via the internet. It’s a website operated as a business, and interested people are invited to become members of the dating site. During the application process (online), applicants or members provide the site with their personal information, and through the site’s network of members people find their match.

Photo from Flickr by SCA Svenska Cellulosa Aktiebolaget

Tips

1. When searching for online dating sites, always remember that there are dating sites that charge exorbitant fees for the services they render the members, and they collect the payments through credit card transactions. There are also plenty of online dating sites that offer free services. When choosing the online dating service, find out as much as you can about them first registering and before giving them your credit card details. Some of these online dating sites are scams, so beware.

Nobody can really guarantee that you will find the perfect partner using an online dating site. However, the chance is great, just as long as you follow the following:

2. Be honest about what you want from the other person. How do you do this? When filling up your information data sheet, specifically mention what it is or you are looking for. For example, you may want someone who can just be a friend and go with you on dates. Or maybe you want something more from the other person, like you want someone you can be intimate with; someone you may marry in the future. This means that if your need is for someone you can be intimate with, and the other person reading your ad online is not into that, then he or she can just leave your profile and go to the next one.

3. Always be honest about who you are and never lie about your age. Remember that even in online dating services, honesty is still the best policy.

4. Never, ever, be tempted to find someone similar to, or just like, the partner you lost.

5. To be on the safe side, do not divulge your home address or telephone number or mobile phone number to anybody online, unless you know the person well enough.

Take a chance again. Find a companion – be it a movie partner or a partner in sport. If you find your new true love, then good for you! Just remember to always be on the safe side – never give out too much information when you’re still on the getting-to-know stage online. Given enough time, arrange for a meeting – who knows, it may just end up like magic for both of you. And if it doesn’t? Never be afraid to try again …

Can't sleep?

If you’re one of those people who’s having a hard time dozing off to “Sleepsville”, maybe you are not eating the right kind of foods. Health experts are saying that eating the right foods a few hours prior to your bedtime may actually help you fall asleep faster as well as improve the quality of your sleep.

So what are these 5 foods that induces sleep?

1. Dairy

Dairy products like yogurt, milk and cheese contain tryptophan which is a sleep-inducing nutrient. Dairy products are also rich in calcium which is very effective in reducing stress and in stabilizing nerve fibers especially those in the brain.

So try having yogurt before going to bed and sleep will come soon.

2. Almonds

Almonds

Almonds contain magnesium which promotes both sleep and muscle relaxation. Almonds also supply the body with proteins which helps maintain a stable blood sugar level while sleeping.

Almonds are available in ready-to-eat packs as plain almond nuts or as almond butter. To ensure that you stay on the healthy level, have a tablespoon of almond butter before bedtime or 1-ounce portion of almonds. This will help your body relax and prepare for sleep.

3. Oatmeal

Whenever you see oatmeal, you think of home and Mom and family and everything “homely”. This makes oatmeal a good “sleeping” food. It’s warm, it’s soft, and it’s very soothing. Moreover, oatmeal is very easy to prepare and very wholesome. Oatmeal is very rich in calcium, magnesium, potassium, phosphorus, and silicon – nutrients known to sustain sleep. To make it healthy, use honey instead of sugar or add fruits to your bowl of oatmeal.

4. Hard-Cooked Eggs

Do you know that hard-cooked eggs can help make you sleep easy and comfortably well? The protein in the hard-cooked egg does the magic; it allows you to sleep through the night. Other foods that offer the same benefit as hard-cooked eggs are cheese, nuts or other protein-rich snack.

Fruit Smoothies

5.Banana

Bananas are an excellent source of magnesium and potassium which helps relax stressed muscles. Bananas also contain tryptophan which changes into serotonin and melatonin, the brain’s key calming hormones.

Eat ripe bananas, or you may also try to make them into banana smoothies by blending one banana, a cup of milk, and some ice.

]]> http://www.relationships4seniors.com/healthy-eating/can%e2%80%99t-sleep-try-these-5-sleep-friendly-foods/feed 0 http://www.relationships4seniors.com/healthy-eating/4-food-ingredients-to-avoid-for-a-healthier-you http://www.relationships4seniors.com/healthy-eating/4-food-ingredients-to-avoid-for-a-healthier-you#comments Thu, 18 Aug 2011 15:39:55 +0000 eugene http://www.relationships4seniors.com/?p=151

We eat not only because we want to live; we eat because we love food and also because eating with family and friends makes life more enjoyable. However, aside from making sure that the food we prepare and serve is delicious, we also have to ensure that what we are serving them is healthy food.

Here are four (4) kinds of food or food ingredients that we must try very hard to avoid using in our recipes in order to ensure that our food is healthy.

1. Butter

Butter

Avoid using butter in the food! I’m sure you’ll have at least two questions running in your mind. One, you might be asking why and what’s wrong with butter?

The answer is simple: butter is made from unsaturated fat, one of the unhealthiest fats there is. Unsaturated fat has been found to be a main culprit in terms of the development of obesity. Butter is used excessively in almost all kinds of sweet foods such as desserts like pastries and cakes. Excessive consumption of butter is also strongly linked to other serious, long term health conditions like cardiovascular disease, Alzheimer’s disease, and even some forms of cancer.

The second question would probably be … or you might be wondering how a particular food will taste like if it requires butter as an ingredient and you don’t use butter in it? My answer? It may taste different, but it sure will be healthier.

So, if, for example the food that you are cooking or preparing requires butter as an ingredient, try substituting it with, say, olive oil. Olive oil is a fat just like butter, and it has this distinct but great taste when used in food. And most importantly, it’s a healthier substitute, so it’s better than butter.

Sugar

Minimizing the use of sugar, or totally avoiding the use of sugar in food preparation is also ideal. Well, how will the food taste without sugar? I suppose you’d be asking this question. The point here is simple; we substitute sugar with healthier options like honey.

It’s true that sugar contains only very minimal calories, but many a times we consume so much sweet food like desserts, it all adds up to too much sweet, hence too much calories. Sugar is a very big contributor to obesity, which also causes diabetes, a very serious illness that are now affecting many people not only in the United States but all throughout the world.

Salt

Salt

Less salt: this is the advice health experts give to people who wants to live long healthy lives. When the salt intake is very high, there is a greater risk of developing chronic health conditions such as arterial disease and stroke.

How will the food taste if salt will be reduced? Food will taste bland! Health experts suggest substituting salt shaker with herbs and spices to make food taste better. Herbs and spices will not only improve the flavor of the foods, it will also help ensure that your food is healthier.

White Carbohydrates

Lastly, avoid any food that’s made up of white carbohydrates. White carbohydrates are any type of carbohydrate that is made from bleached white flour. Examples of these types of food include white bread and pasta. Do you know that these foods have been stripped of the majority of their fiber? Fiber, as we all know, is one of the most important components of any grain as it helps keep the digestive system healthy and clean. If you really need to use bread, use whole wheat bread as they are healthier.

It has been said that the surest foundation for a healthy, loving, and lasting relationship is friendship. If you are a friend to your partner, and he or she is to you, then there is a greater chance that your relationship will work and last.

Is this applicable to those who are trying their hands on their nth relationship? The answer is a big and resounding yes! Whatever the reason for the last relationship, the most important is that there was a lesson learned and that there is determination to be better in the next relationships that will come in the future.

You Marry Your Best Friend

Finding a partner when one is older is a lot different that when a person was younger. Notice however, that I said different, not harder. This is very true: when a person is older, it can be expected that his or her preferences are different than that of a younger person. His experiences in his previous relationships will have a bearing on what he wants in a relationship and from the person he plans to share his life with in the future.

In finding a potential partner then, these are the most important things to consider.

Tip #1 Be Honest. Both should be honest with each other in terms of expectations, wants, needs, and even limitations. It is better to enter into a relationship in a clean slate – hiding nothing.

Tip # 2 Consider Your Families. For older, more mature people, getting into a relationship can sometimes be hard because of other parties involved. For example, there may be children from past marriages that may challenge the new relationship. Of course there are children who do not meddle with such relationships, but let’s face it; there are also children who do. This is especially true when financial matters are involved, such as properties etc.

Tip # 3 Check Both Your Personalities. For some people, opposites attract, and they like it. For some people, they want someone who is “more alike” – they like the same kinds of food, the same movies, the same music, even the same sports. Be sure that you know what you want and you are willing to listen to the other person as well.

Are you an introvert or a shy person? What type of person do you like for a partner – someone like you or someone totally different from you? What if the person you like is an extrovert or an outgoing person? Would you be willing to listen to him or her talk for hours and hours? What if he or she is the introvert type and you are not; and he would rather just sit silent and read a book rather than talk? Will you be okay with that?

These are just some of the things you have to consider when finding a partner. And always remember that every relationship is unique, as unique as the individuals that are bonded in that relationship. To recognize and respect each person’s individuality is one key factor in the success of any relationship.

So at this point, I’d like to say to you, if you are looking for that special someone who will put a smile in your face and keep you smiling all day long …

Good Luck!

All of us want our relationships to work, but the question to ask is this: are we willing to do everything for it to work?

Actually, this is where the problem normally starts. Most of us want our relationships to work, but we want it to work without much effort on our part.

Here’s a case in point, and let’s look at you. Yes, you! Have you listened to yourself lately? For example, what do you normally do when things don’t go the way you want it to? Do you take full responsibility for it?

The question is raised because under normal situations, and in most relationships, the tendency is to always blame your partner rather than yourself. We always say they don’t understand, or that they don’t see things as they are, or that they just don’t care enough. Ask yourself: when was the last time you took the blame and said it’s your fault?

Let’s ask ourselves, when was the last time we said we’re sorry instead of pointing our finger to the other person?

Here’s the point: for relationships to work, we need to work at it. And here’s the 3 best ways to go about:

Tip #1 Stop the Blame Game

Stop the blame game and look at the situation objectively. Seek to understand, and then do your best to communicate with each other. Look at the situation in the context of what you can do to better it. Simply put, begin with yourself. Look at the good; stop being critical; try humility and patience. Communicate lovingly. Remember the saying “a soft answer turneth away wrath”? It works.

Tip #2 Focus On The Positive

Catch your partner doing something good and right, and focus on that. This does not mean overlooking the mistakes; it simply means try to balance how you look at things. Nobody is perfect, even you. So give room for little mistakes, little errors. We are all a work-in-progress.

Tip #3 Express Love More Often

Love has always been likened to a plant. For it to grow, it needs constant nourishment. Plants need water and sunshine; people need to feel they are needed, wanted, and appreciated. Be generous with your expressions of genuine love and appreciation. Compliment each other sincerely. Find one good thing everyday and tell your partner about it. Some of you may say there’s really no need because they know already. Let me tell you, it matters. We all need to hear, even once in a while, that we are loved and appreciated because that’s how we grow as human beings. Knowing that we are needed and loved puts a glow into our cheeks. It makes waking up in the morning more meaningful!

Nourish your love for a more meaningful relationship. Let’s not forget that in the end, it’s our relationships that give us more lasting happiness.

So you’re vacationing! To make sure that you enjoy your vacation to the fullest, prepare for every needful thing. Make sure you do not forget anything!

To do this, make a checklist of all the things you need to prepare – from things to bring with you to the things that will be left behind. Having a checklist will guarantee that you do not forget anything and that you bring with you all the necessary things you need. Moreover, it also means you save a lot of money because then you won’t have to buy anything that’s not in your vacation budget just because you forgot to bring it with you.

Your Checklist

Your checklist should be complete. It should have categories such as the following:

Necessities, which should include the following:

• travel tickets (airline tickets for air travel and/or boat tickets if going on a cruise)
• hotel reservation and confirmation documents
• Wallets, Cash, Travel Cards, Debit Cards, Credit Cards, Travelers Checks
• Passport
• Medical Insurance cards
• Road map (if you’re taking a road trip)
• Calling cards and/or ID’s
• Travel Insurance

Clothes. Be sure to bring appropriate clothes fit for your destination. For example, if you’re going swimming, it’s ideal to bring 2 pairs of swimsuits. Other things to bring under this category may also include the following:

• Shirts
• Pants
• Shorts
• Underwear
• Socks
• Sweater or Jacket (if the destination is expected to be cold or rainy)
• Bathing Towels (although if you’re staying in a hotel they do provide towels)

Footwear. Be sure to bring one that’s comfortable. Bring at least two (wear one and take an extra). You may also include:

• Slippers
• comfortable shoe

Toiletries. Bring your own

• Shampoo
• bath soap
• toothbrush
• toothpaste
• hand and body lotion
• sunblock
• deodorants
• shave and shaving cream
• cotton buds/balls
• mouthwash, and

Medicines. This is very important especially if you have maintenance medicine. Be sure to bring enough and a little to spare (in case you spill some). Be sure to include the following:

• Your prescription medicine properly labeled
• First aid kit which should include essentials such as pain killers and allergy medicines (if someone in the family has allergies).

Accessories. These are also essentials as they can greatly impact the quality of your vacation. The list should include the following:

• Mobile phone charger
• Camera battery charger
• Extra batteries
• Flashlight
• Scissor
• Pocket knife (especially if vacationing outdoors)

Lastly, as much as possible, travel light by bringing only the necessities.

So make your list, and tick each item as you put them in your luggage.

When people commit into a relationship, they are motivated to do so for two reasons: to love and to be loved in return. People get into relationships not just to give of themselves and everything they’ve got, somehow they also expect to receive the same in return, if not more. The act is more of an investment; in loving the other person, a reward is somehow expected in return. Sadly, in real life, people do not always get what they want, or worst, what they deserve. That’s not how relationships work in actual life; the ideal remains an ideal; expectations are not met, and in the process, hearts are broken.

Many books have been written about what makes a relationship work, and of all the things that have been mentioned and emphasized, one essential key is communication.

Communication

Communication is described as the exchange of information through messages, symbols, thoughts, signs and opinions. As human beings, we communicate by using the most basic ways of communication: we speak, we sing, we do sign language, our body moves in a particular manner and it’s referred to as our body language, through our touch, and lastly, through eye contact. In a formal learning environment, these basic ways of communication are classified into four types or categories: 1) Verbal Communication, 2) Non-Verbal Communication, 3) Written Communication, and 4) Visual Communication.

Part of communication is listening. It is described as an art, and is said to be the most effective tool in communication. One adage even says something like “listening is more important than speaking – that’s why human beings are given two ears to listen and only one mouth with which to speak”.

Listening Defined

How do you feel when you know that the other person is really listening to you intently? Isn’t it true that you feel important? Don’t you feel that you are respected? When you are listened to, do you not feel that you are loved? To all these questions, the answer is yes!

Have you heard of people complained like this? “You’re listening, yes! But you’re not hearing me!”

Listening is more than just appearing to hear. It is a process that consists of four stages: sensing and attending; understanding and interpreting; remembering, and responding. It means paying close attention to what is being said. Then it means evaluating what is heard. Then the last part is a demonstration of a response, which means that the listener needs to act or respond with what was said or done.

The Challenge in Every Relationship

The challenge in every relationship is that each partner has a need to be heard, thus, at times both speak (not at the same time, of course) and say something expecting to be heard. However, in most cases, instead of listening intently to who is speaking, the other party is also busy thinking about what he or she wants to say. Thus, the result is this: nobody heard anything.

In relationships, two unique individuals are brought together, and as can be expected, their uniqueness and differences will often challenge the love they have for each other. Differences in culture for instance, in beliefs, in values, in principles, in their individual needs and wants, in how they were brought up, in their educational backgrounds or level – these are just few of the things that can complicate a relationship unintentionally. They key to meeting halfway and making the relationship work is good communication. Each party must be willing to pause and listen, hear, and then respond appropriately. As what Stephen R. Covey said in his book the 7 Habits of Highly Effective People: “Seek first to understand, then to be understood”. This is perfect communication. Can it be done? Yes, because true love knows no boundaries.

Well, undeniably, the topic is something that not very many people are open to. It is a fact that there are still quite a lot of people who, until this day, can not understand why a person who’s old will still want to date someone who is equally old at that.

If such question ever arise, it’s clear that there are still so many out there who do not understand the fact that people as human beings – regardless of age, have needs, and these needs have to be met, for it is the essence of existence. Needs drive people; it motivates us human beings to work harder, aim higher and farther, even to dream bigger. Besides, what’s in a date?

The need to be with someone; the need to be able to communicate; the need to be listened to and heard; the need to be understood; the need to be appreciated, to be missed – all these and more are human needs regardless of age. To the young, these things are normally taken for granted. But for those who have been through many things in life, it’s something that is far greater than anything money can buy.

So, if you’re a senior who wants to date a senior, go ahead! Do not let your age ever stop you!

Things to Do to Make Your Date Meaningful

Let’s face it, with aging comes the little discomforts – the joint pains, the cramp in the back, maybe the poor eyesight. This means that riding horses and climbing hills are no longer options when you are planning your date. But there are still so many things that you can do together.

Think about spending time together one bright morning in a park somewhere.

You bring a picnic basket, a blanket, your favorite book that you want to share with your date, and some food that you both like. You can just sit and talk and have a great time.

Another nice thing you can do is walk together, early in the morning or early  evening, holding hands. You can do it in the park or in the Mall. Just be sure to wear your most comfortable footwear. Remember, it’s not the distance that you cover: it’s how you hold each other’s hand while walking slowly.

How can you make your dates memorable? Very easy: by giving each other something to remember this special time that you’ve spent together. So for example, if you’re in a Mall, be watchful for small dainty things that you can purchase as a remembrance of the moment you’ve spent together. It can be a book (if you he or she loves reading), a small token that will remind him/her of you, or even a flower picked along the way. These mementos, again, need not be expensive. Your date will simply love the thought that goes with these small but romantic things that will make even the simplest walk in the park or in the Mall unforgettable.

There’s one more thing that many older people like to do; sing. Oh! Not the karaoke type of singing – that is a bit way off. Songs from before were more romantic, more meaningful, and the melody were pleasant and soothing. Hum or sing softly to her or him while you’re walking or while your sitting together.

Meaningful dates need not be expensive. It’s the little things that actually count, and many seniors are experts on that. Ever wonder why?

Because with age comes wisdom!

Many seniors will look towards a dating service as a means of getting back into the world of relationships. However, not every experience with a dating service with a dating service necessarily delivers on the expectations of the member. Dating services are, after all, no different than any other service provider. In some instances, the service can deliver on the needs of its customers and other times it may fall well below expectations. So, what can a senior do when the experience with the service is less than desirable? Here are a few ideas:

Identify what the problem was with the service. Here is a common example many people have with dating services: a lack of an internal instant messenger system. Without an IM, it becomes necessary to use email as the sole means of communicating and, often, email is not enough. The answer to this problem would be looking towards another service that does have an IM system. Of course, IM is used here as an example. The same process could be applied towards any other issue with the site.

Make sure that it is the site that is the problem and not your particular approach. Yes, this tactic will require a lot of honest self-assessment but it will be worth it in the end. If your approach is not what is should be then you need to seek self-improvement strategies that will ensure your odds of success will increase over time.

Don’t get down on yourself and give up. Defeatists are not the type of people that succeed in life. Online dating can take a little while to get the hang of and that is one no one should assume they will succeed with it right off the bat. Take a little time, assess your situation, and then improve upon your approach. This will decrease the number of time an online dating service seemingly fails to deliver.

When you “approach” someone online via a dating service, you can do so from what is essentially an anonymous and detached manner. After all, you are making initial contact via email or instant messenger systems. This is a great deal easier than having to approach someone in person. This reduces much of the nervousness associated with the initial approach which makes the whole process a lot easier.

Online dating also has another valuable benefit: those that sign on to such a service create a profile that describes who they actual are. When you approach a stranger in “real life” you really have nothing to go on except physical attraction. That is because you know absolutely nothing about the person. With an online dating profile, this is most assuredly not the case as you can read about the person’s likes, dislikes, hobbies, and personal beliefs. This certainly makes any approach much easier since you know a little bit about the person before making any contact.

Yes, being out of the dating game for many years makes returning a little difficult. Thankfully, online dating sites make the transition back into the “game” a lot easier than it would have only a few short years ago. So, if you are a senior and are nervous about getting back into the dating game, online dating might be your best option. It is stress free and easy to engage in. Those too points alone make it well worth looking into.